you stole my heart

Friday, September 05, 2003

JOkes Of The Day

Q : What is the strongest muscle?
A : Tongue.... Because it can raise woman's hip with just one lick.

Q : What is the lightest muscle?
A : Penis.... Because it can be raised by a woman's lips!

Fact: A woman can guide a 1.5" diameter penis into an inch diameter vagina in pitch dark without looking, but cannot park a 6ft long car in a 7th long parking space in daylight!

The 69 position is like driving in rush hour, the asshole is always in front of you!

Advantages of having an affair with a married women. They give like hell. They do not yell. They do not tell. They do not swell and there are no wedding bells!

The Pussy Poem
This is a hole that never heals, the more you rub it the better it feels. But all the soap from here to hell, can never remove that fucking smell.

Q: What is the difference between a chicken and a baby?
A: A chicken is the result of a SITTING HEN whereas a baby is the result of a STANDING COCK!

My dad told me that if Adam and Eve were Chinese, we would be still be in paradise. Why? Because they would have eaten the snake instead of the bloody apple!

Q : Why do men snore when lying on their backs?
A : Because their balls flop over their asshole and this causes an airlock!

Q : What is the difference between a black and a white fairy tale?
A : White begins "Once upon a time......." Black begins "Y'all mo'fuckers a'int gonna believe this shit......"

Q : What is the difference between a PANTY & a STAGE CURTAIN?
A : When you pull down the STAGE CURTAIN, the show is over, but when you pull down the PANTY..... it is SHOWTIME!

Q : What is the similarity between a wife and a chewing gum?
A : Both are sweet in the beginning but become tasteless and shapeless later.